![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
Hey all,
As promised, I'm writing to tell you all about my new journal. I have finished it and so for those of you who would like to add it the user name is mn-songbird. I swear it's my final change. There are lots of things that inspired this user name and I'll tell you all about them in the mn-songbird journal.
I'll see you in the next chapter of my life.
Eryn
As promised, I'm writing to tell you all about my new journal. I have finished it and so for those of you who would like to add it the user name is mn-songbird. I swear it's my final change. There are lots of things that inspired this user name and I'll tell you all about them in the mn-songbird journal.
I'll see you in the next chapter of my life.
Eryn
- Mood:
accomplished - Music:Phantom Of The Opera, Music Of The Night
 | VoicePost  751K 3:51 | (no transcription available) |
- Location:Lost in Thaught
- Mood:
mellow - Music:Joseph Arthur - Honey In the Moon
- Location:Sitting in my room
- Mood:
annoyed - Music:Cradle Of Filth - Temptation
Sup Ya'll
Ok, since I'm writing this late, I'm putting all the events behind a cut. Besides that, It's going to be a long entry. Enjoy!
( MyTripToGeorgia )
Well, now you are all up to speed on My life at moment. I hope that everyone had an awesome Thanksgiving, I did. I ate lots of food and man it was good. I hope you guys all ate till you couldn't eat anymore. That's the one's of you who celebrate that is. *smiles*
I wanted to post the lyrics to this song in here. It's one of my new favorite songs By Elvis. I had this song sang and dedicated to me by someone very special. The title is Please Don't Stop Loving Me.
( SongLyrics )
It's a short song but a sweet one.
Ok, I'm out now. I'll write again soon.
<3<3<3hugs all<3<3<3
Eryn
P.S. Don't forget to check out the cookbook.
- Mood:
loved - Music:Elvis Presley - Please Don't Stop Loving Me
| VoicePost 609K 3:09 | (no transcription available) |
Hey all,
I would like to thank all of you for your support in my time of sorrow. I will get better again, I know i will. It may take some time but I will be ok again. It is said that time heals all and I didn't want to believe it when I first heard it but it really does.
I created an aim name in honor of my father and don't plan to change it so if yu would like to add it to aim feel free. the name is Dads Princess79
At this time I don't really have anything else to write so I'll end for now.
<3<3<3hugs all<3<3<3
Eryn
P>S> This is probably the shortest entry in the history of all my writings.
- Mood:
tired - Music:Simon and Garfunkel - Scarborough Fair (Canticle)
Hello readers,
Let me start by saying that the cookbook is back. I have created a new one because it made more sense to me then combining them into one. So far, if you go there you will see some Halloween recipes that I have already put into it. I will try to put a few more in there for you to see. After Halloween of course things will go back to normal for the recipe side of things. I will try to find some Thanksgiving ones as that holiday gets closer. As for me going back to normal? Well, I’m not sure that I ever was normal, oh what is normal anyway? Anyhow, enjoy the cookbook! The link for it is http://mn-angel.livejournal.com
I won’t put the link directly in here anymore. It will be above with the rest of my links where I usually put them.
As for this next part of my entry…I missed a birthday. I tried to post on this person’s birthday but for some reason, the good live journal was being stubborn and not letting me post. When I finally was able to, I had lost my entire entry. That’s my luck though. The luck of the Irish was not with me that night. So…HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE amethystmond! I hoep it was a good one and that you got everything you wanted for that moment. I hope that life treated you well that day. So, happy late birthday and many more to come.
And now for my sad part of this entry.
I am warning you now, if you don’t’ want to read sad stuff, don’t read any further.
This past weekend, I came into some sadness. My mother called to tell me my father isn’t doing so well and that we have to make a trip to Georgia to be with him. My father has cancer and has been battling it for quite a few years. Well, they put him on a new chemo drug that didn’t’ agree with him at all. It made him so sick and gave him really nasty mouth sores like chemo does. Those are natural side-effects of taking that stuff. I remember that from watching Jim go through it. My father decided that he didn’t’ want anymore treatment. He has decided that it is his time to die. He said he doesn’t’ want to live like this anymore. He has stopped eating and drinking and has been very weak. I have to think that part of his weakness is from lack of food and drink. He has been getting dehydrated from lack of fluids but wont’ let anyone give him an IV to help. That was the weekend before last now. My mother wanted to bring some IV supplies and a few bags of fluid to give to him but sadly, by the time we got there it was to late for that. It was decided that no matter what it took, we needed to go down to Georgia to see my father. No one knew how long he had to live and we needed to see him.
We left last Wendsday in the morning and got there on Thursday around 5 o’clock eastern time. We ended up staying at a hotel on Wendsday night as it would have been a really long drive to have kept going. As it is, the trip from Minnesota to Georgia takes about 22 hours or something, maybe more. I lose track of time when in a car for several hours at a time. Anyhow, we got there and we went in right away to see my father. My mother went and saw him first and said hello to him. He wasn’t very responsive. Then it was my turn. I went over to his bedside and stood there looking down at him. I took his hand and spoke to him, I said hello and let him know I was there. He said hello back to me and kept trying to open his eyes so he could see me. He took his hand and was rubbing them wanting to get them to open and he finally succeeded. That was the last coherent thing he said, was hi to me. He was so weak and seemed so fragile. None of us knew that that would be the last day he would be alive. We kept trying to get him to hold on until my brothers could get there and he did as long as he could.
At 11:00 that night, on November 2, 2007, my father passed away. He just couldn’t’ hold on any longer. I had fallen asleep because I was so tired and they woke me up to tell me. My father didn’t’ want anyone in the room with him when he died, he didn’t’ want anyone to watch him go. I wish I could have been awake before he went so I could have at least let him know I love him and to say my goodbyes. Maybe that’s what he didn’t’ want, he didn’t’ want anyone to say goodbye. My mother brought me down to his room so I could see him. My father was at home, he didn’t’ want to be in the hospital or anything like that, he wanted his house in his own room and I can’t blame him. I walked into the room thinking no, this isn’t real, I’m dreaming. I kept thinking that I was having some kind of nightmare and that I’d wake up and he’d still be alive. Well, that wasn’t the case obviously. I held his hand for a few minutes and just cried. I left the room for a bit to drink some hot tea and see if I could collect my thoughts. My father decided that he wanted to be creamated and so the creamatory was on there way to collect his body. Before they got there, I went back into the room to see him for the last time. I took his hand and told him I love him and goodbye. I told him I’d miss him as well. I don’t’ know how I’ll deal with him being gone.
My father I feel was the only one in my family who understood me the most. He never judged me for anything at all and was always there to support me no matter what I was doing. He always told me that he wanted me to find and marry a prince so that I’d be happy, he used to call me his princess all the time. When we were in Missouri he and I sat at the kitchen table in the cabin and colored pictures out of a coloring book. He picked a prince and a princess. The princess he said was me and the prince was my fiancee, my soon to be husband and he made up this whole story about how things happened, how we met and how we fell in love and how he got along with my family. He even had some funny parts in it too. Like he said that the prince was up to late partying with my brothers and therefore he was suffering from a bad hangover the next morning. I laughed not thinking my dad would ever come up with something like that. My dad was the most awesome person I know. I will miss him so much and I love him very much.
I want to post a few things in here in his honor. Some dedications if you will. The first is a poem. I know he wasn’t this religion but I am and so…it’s the one I found appropriate to post. It comforts me a bit.
She Only Takes The Best
Goddess saw he was getting tired
And a cure was not to be
So she put her arms around him
And whispered "Come with me"
With tearful eyes we watched him suffer
And saw him fade away
Although we loved him dearly
We could not make him stay
A golden heart stopped beating
Hardworking hands put to rest
Goddess broke our hearts to prove to us
She only takes the best
The next is a song. The name of it is, Can You Hear Me When I Talk To You.
Time passes by so quickly,
But I guess I thought you'd be here forever,
I never even had the chance to say goodbye,
Theres so many things to tell you, Left unsaid until now,
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Do the words I say ever make it through?Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Cause' I'd give anything if I just knew..
Everynight I have the same dream,
The one where you get to hold me,
We laugh and talk until the morning, and then you vanish...yea..
It always leaves me feeling helpless, When i wake up and your not there,
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Do you know how much I'd love to be with you?
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Cause' I'd give anytihng if I just knew.
Living in this world without you,
I constantly search through my memories,
Hoping that I'll find some treasures that I passed over...yea
All that I took for granted,
Means so much now and I won't let it go.
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Cause I never said somethings that I meant to
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Cause I'd give anything if I just knew..
Ya know I never said something that I meant to,
Can you hear me when I talk to you?
Cause I'd give anythign if I just knew...
I miss you daddy.
And one more song that I want to post and dedicate to my father is Wind Beneath My Wings.
Without my father, I don’t know that I’d be who I am today. I know I am and will always be set in my ways, but he did guide me and help me along the way lots.
Wind Beneath My Wings
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.
So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strength.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.
Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.
It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.
Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, the wind beneath my wings.
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,
so high I almost touch the sky.
Thank you, thank you,
thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings.
In a couple of weeks, we will make the long trip back to Georgia to attend my father’s memorial services and go through his things and take things of his so we have things of his for memories. I was given two leather jackets that were his and I will keep them and not let anything happen to them.
Well, that’s it from here for now. I can’t write anymore. Crying to hard and can’t think. I’ll miss him and will never forget the kind of person he was.
I’ll write again soon. <3<3<3hugs to all, you are all special to me somehow, in some way.<3<3<3
Tell your friends and family how much you love them and that you are glad they are here for you. You never know when the day will come that they aren’t around anymore.
Eryn
- Location:Lost somewhere in my thaughts
- Mood:
depressed - Music:Heather Nova - Wanna Be Your Light (Your World Pagan Radio W.P.R)
Ok well, since I haven’t been able to post for a couple of days…I’m putting my entries into one entry. I’ll put them all behind cuts so you can read the days you want and it won’t take up my friends page with clutter. I could have done voice posts, but AI wanted to write instead. I miss writing, it helps relieve stress and things of that nature.
( ”Oct16” )
( ”Oct17” )
- Location:In my room
- Mood:
contemplative - Music:IRC chatter
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